Birchpaw: A Confession
by Rockstorm
Summary: Think that Ashfur was the one responsible for Firestar getting caught in Hawkfrost's foxtrap? Think again. This is a fanfic from Birchpaw's P.O.V. -Discontinued-
1. Warm Beginnings

_Come. Sit with me beneath the shade, young warrior. Why, you ask? Let me introduce myself. I am Birchleaf, an elder of ThunderClan. I know that my moons are wearing thin and I am getting ready to join StarClan. But before I do, I need to tell you something. Something that you are most likely not expecting. Some cats have been blaming Ashfur, my old mentor, for getting Firestar caught in the fox trap, that fateful day. Some cats say that Ashfur tricked Firestar and was on Hawkfrost's side all along. Well, I'm sick of it! Ashfur was a good cat! A good warrior! Before I pass to StarClan, I need you to tell your Clan something important. I have to make a confession._

--------------

_My story begins shortly after Mudclaw's death, when Squirrelflight and Brambleclaw had still been fighting…_

"Birchpaw! Are you ready for training?" Ashfur, my mentor, purred as he made his way across the ThunderClan camp to greet me.

I nodded, excitement tingling on every hair in my pelt, "Yes! Let's go hunting!" I replied, padding after him. Suddenly, a bright, cheery voice called Ashfur's name from across the clearing. It was Squirrelflight! My mentor bounded straight over to her and they touched noses gently. "I was just going to take Birchpaw out for some training, but I'll see you when I get back." he meowed, his voice soft and caring. Squirrelflight nodded, affection gleaming in her leaf-green eyes, "Of course! Then maybe we could go on patrol?" Ashfur nodded and I followed him out of the gorse tunnel. Just another day in ThunderClan camp.

----

I remember even further back when Brambleclaw and Squirrelflight's fight started. Squirrelflight's cold hiss still rings in my ears, "If _you think that, you don't know me at all!_" she had snarled, after Brambleclaw implied that she had a bias against any kin of Tigerstar's. Ashfur had been quite alarmed and had rushed to the furious she-cat's side.

"Squirrelflight! Squirrelflight, wait!" Ashfur called, panting and racing after her, but she clearly wanted to be alone. He fretted, but I said nothing, not really knowing what could be said. Later on, back at camp, I saw Squirrelflight sitting at the center of a small group of cats, describing the new territory with wide, bright eyes. I noticed Leafpool watching her sister's feigned joy and excitement, but I could see as well as her that Squirrelflight kept glancing around camp. She still wanted Brambleclaw. And neither I, nor Ashfur had a problem with that. But Brambleclaw and Squirrelflight didn't resolve their fight that night, nor the next morning. In fact, a full moon went by that the two cats clashed and snarled. It was then, that Ashfur became closer to Squirrelflight than he usually was. I remember one day, when the three of us were collecting moss…

Casting a mischievous glance at Ashfur, who was gathering moss from another nearby tree, Squirrelflight hooked up her ball with the claws of one paw and hurled it at him. It landed accurately in the middle of his back and disintegrated, covering his pelt with scraps of moss.

Ashfur spun around to face her. "Hey!" he exclaimed, dropping his moss. I laughed, but quickly picked up a large ball of moss to muffle it.  
Ashfur's eyes gleaming with laughter, the gray warrior scooped up his own moss and flung it at Squirrelflight. She dodged behind the tree to avoid it, and crashed strait into Brambleclaw.

"What's going on?" the tabby tomcat demanded. "What are you doing?"

A short squabble between Brambleclaw and Squirrelflight followed, both blaming the other for the work not getting done. Finally, Brambleclaw turned and stalked off, not bothering to acknowledge my presence. "I can't believe him!" Squirrelflight growled angrily when the tom was out of sight, her emerald eyes narrowed and flashing.

"Take it easy," Ashfur meowed. "Brambleclaw's just trying to make sure everything gets done. We're all under pressure, with only one apprentice." She sighed, but the softness in her eyes told me that she appreciated his support.

----

It went on like this for awhile, Ashfur and Squirrelflight growing closer and spending more and more time together. And all the while, Brambleclaw was getting worse. He snapped at his Clanmates, growled at Squirrelflight, and all but attacked Ashfur. He glared when Squirrelflight ate with Ashfur and I. He pointed out our every flaw. And, despite my outward friendliness, he seemed bitter towards me that I was not his apprentice. Brightheart and Cloudtail noticed Brambleclaw's hostility as well. One day, it got to the point where Ferncloud warned me to be very careful around the dark tabby.

I knew to be wary not to cross his path, but surely Brambleclaw wasn't a bad cat? Surely he was merely angry at Squirrelflight after their fight? But, as time wore on, even Leafpool looked at Brambleclaw with worry and fear in her eyes.

--------------

"Please excuse me, I'm getting very old and I tire easily. Be patient, young warrior, my story is not yet finished. I must rest, rest for just a little while before I continue. Just have patience.


	2. Warning Signs

_Ah, welcome back, young warrior! Are you ready to hear the next chapter of my tail- er tale, I mean. Haha, ignore my humor. I'm rather… odd lately! But this is not a humorous tale, I'm afraid. Listen closely, for the next piece is coming…_

As I have already told you, life was going wonderfully. I was shaping into a fine warrior, Ashfur was happy, and our Clan, for the most part, was at peace. But as time went by, I noticed Squirrelflight still wouldn't see that Ashfur wanted more than to just be fellow warriors. It seemed that, no matter how much Ashfur tried to make it clear, she wasn't understanding. This was one such moment.

Ashfur and Squirrelflight sat, side-by-side, sharing a plump mouse. They were speaking in low murmurs and from where I was sitting, I couldn't make out the words. My mentor was happy and smiling, a light glimmering in his eyes that I had never seen before. Squirrelflight took no notice. Her gaze kept wandering all around the clearing, before settling upon the cat that sat, laughing, with Brackenfur and Whitepaw. Bramblecaw. I sighed, was there no hope for Ashfur? He protected her, he defended her, he loved her with every hair on his pelt. I drew in a sharp breath, what if Squirrelflight didn't care about Ashfur at all? What if it was all just an elaborate show to make Brambleclaw jealous and to encourage an apology from the tabby tom? Despite my usual good nature towards Ashfur's friends, a growl rose in my throat. How could Squirrelflight do that? Couldn't she see what she was doing to Ashfur? I had to talk to my mentor! I had to talk to him soon!

----

"Ashfur?" my voice was low and tentative, when I decided it was time for him to know. I was unsure of how to approach the subject.

He was crouched, stalking a blue jay, but his ears pricked towards me when he caught the tint of anxiety in my voice. He sat up, abandoning the prey. "What is it, Birchpaw?" he asked, his eyes dark with concern.

"I…I know how you feel about Squirrelflight," I meowed levelly, meeting his gaze.

He remained still and silent for a moment, then nodded for me to continue.

"She doesn't… she doesn't really love you. She loves Brambleclaw. Squirrelflight just wants to make him jealous and you… you were the easiest target." I flinched, all but expecting a cuff over my ears for my bluntness and disregard for his thoughts and feelings.

Ashfur did nothing, merely sat, finally he meowed. "No, Birchpaw, it only seems that way. Brambleclaw upset her, he hurt her and I came to protect her and love her. Squrrelflight wouldn't love him. She's just afraid of how he might react, so she's afraid to be more than a friend to me." he smiled, believing he had convinced me.

"But-" I was cut off by a flick of his gray tail.

"Thank you for your concern, Birchpaw," Ashfur replied, rising to his feet, "but you have no need to get involved. It is between Squirrelflight and I."

My shoulders sagged, I had tried, but to no avail. The gray warrior couldn't be convinced that the she-cat he loved was only pretending to love him. I sighed, tossing a sideways glance up at my mentor. What could I do? What could anycat do to save him from drowning in his own desire for love.

----

Alas, I could do nothing. And indeed, there was nothing to do. Ashfur drew closer to Squirrelflight grew more open. The Clan knew, Brambleclaw knew and Ashfur's best friend Rainwhisker knew.

"Ashfur," I heard Rainwhisker say to my mentor one soft greenleaf morning, "Be careful where your heart lies. You are sharing her love with another. No matter how hard you try, Squirrelflight will never be just yours." he murmered, leaning in close to Ashfur.

Ashfur shook his head, but the seriousness in his friend's tone made him wonder. I could see it in his eyes, the apprehension, the curiosity. He was thinking, thinking deep. I blinked and padded over to him, knowing what three words would push him over the edge of just considering. I would verbally shove him into the freezing water of confusion. "Brambleclaw is watching." I murmured, brushing past him, "Brambleclaw knows."

----

Sharp mutterings and snarls drew my attention to a bundle of underbrush behind the nursery. I crept closer, listening, "Hawkfrost can't be trusted, Brambleclaw!" Squirrelflight's desperate mew stung my ears. I flinched at Brambleclaw's burning reply, "He's my half-brother! What do you want me to do? Kill him?" the mutters got softer and Brambleclaw and Squirrelflight padded out from the underbrush, both looking weary and tired of fighting. "I give up." Squirrelflight finally meowed, as I slipped out of view just in time not to be caught, "It's not going to work then, you and I? I'll just never mean enough to you. Some cats just mean more to you than me." she growled and padded out. "No, Squirrelflight--wait!" he yowled, "You mean everything to me, Squirrelflight!" Despite my anger at Brambleclaw and Squirrelflight, I pitied them. They were addicted to each other. They couldn't let go. And all the while, the ground under Ashfur's paws was crumbling beneath him. But the danger wasn't over yet. Another threat was coming, a threat beyond compare. It would shift relationships, twist alliances, and for two precious cats, it would be the end of the road.

_-cough- I'm getting a bit old for such a tale. But I must finish, I must clean Ashfur's name. The Clan never found out, but Brambleclaw and Squirrelflight assumed it. They shunned him 'till the day he died. And even then, Squirrelflight would not mourn him. He must be saved, he must rest with StarClan in peace._


End file.
